I told my mother. I'd been thinking about it for a while. She and I have always been pretty close, at least close enough that she's got a fair idea of my movements, and the names of my friends, if not what I get up to when I'm with them! So it was feeling increasingly awkward answering questions with one word answers, not elaborating on details, and just generally feeling as though I was being dishonest, which I don't do particularly well. I knew that if I didn't tell her eventually we would drift apart a little, and I didn't want that to happen. Also, this is something that has made me immensely happy in the past few months, and I wanted to share that with her.
Of course, I was worried what her reaction would be. After all, I was telling her that her darling daughter was into sexual practices which would not be deemed normal by the majority of the population, and that I had a whole new group of friends who were into the same sorts of things that I was, and who would probably be seen as "perverts" by most people (sorry guys!). Not exactly the sort of thing any parents is going to be particularly thrilled to hear.
Bless her, I didn't exactly give her much choice in the matter either. I said that I wanted to tell her something, but I knew she didn't need to know. That she would probably be shocked, even though it was a good thing for me, and that it would probably change the way she saw me. So if she didn't want to know what I had to tell her, we could finish the conversation there and then, and never speak of it again. Obviously she said that she had better hear what I had to say... so I told her.
Nervously, and with quite a lot of stumbling, I explained to her what I liked, and why I liked it.(Um, not the details, I hasten to add. It's enough for her to know that I like to be spanked. She doesn't need to know that I prefer straps to canes!!) I explained how happy it had made me over the past few months, and how I had some amazing new friends to share this with, and that some of the names I had mentioned were not friends I'd met through work, or through my Am Dram activities, but through my love of spanking.
Much to my relief, she seems to be OK with it. I'm sure, deep down, she would probably rather I was not "like this", but she was supportive, and said that as long as I was happy (and safe, how very "mum") that was all that mattered. She also said that she had noticed that I seemed happier over the past few months.
So it's all good. I'm very glad I told her, and that my faith in her was justified. Of course, I will probably never have in depth conversations with her about it, but I can at least now be honest about where I am and who I am with, and our relationship will not be driven apart by my secret. And knowing that has made me even happier. So here's to my mother. Who won't be reading this, but nevertheless is a fabulous and understanding woman.
1 day ago