Three Types Of Play

I've probably talked before about the different types of play I enjoy. There's three main ones. One is “just for fun”, when it's me, not in character, not being spanked for anything in particular, the second when it's still me, but the spanking is more serious, either because there is a genuine reason behind it, or just because I want a “serious” spanking. The last one is obviously role play. All the different types have their merits. Just for fun spankings are great, if very superficial. Being hoiked over someone's lap because you've just made a cheeky remark is (mostly) always fun. Letting a switchy friend loose on your bottom just for the sake of it can be very amusing.
Role play, likewise, is immense fun. Of course, half (if not more) of the joy of role play is the fun of being a different character, often in a different time, and getting so involved in your character that you react as them and not yourself, even if that character is influenced by aspects of your own personality.

I think the type of play I enjoy the most though, is the more serious stuff. Stuff like this, when I can just let go, submit. There's only a handful of people that I like to play that seriously with, or rather, I suppose, that I trust enough to play like that with. If I'm making myself vulnerable in that way, then I need to be doing so with people I trust not just to let me fall, but to catch me as well. You see, the thing is when I do play more intensely like this, the reason I love it is not because of the pain, or the amount of strokes I take or anything like that. It's because I can be me, and, once in a while, I can submit, and be submissive. (The two are not always the same).

This is something I've not yet been able to achieve in role play, and I'm not sure whether I ever will. My instinct is always to create characters who are, shall we say, somewhat spirited. Cheeky Jemima, opinionated Francesca, spoilt Lucinda. These are not women who would ever submit willingly to anything. In creating these characters I make it very difficult to reach any sort of submissive headspace in role. Maybe my next character needs to be the submissive type?

That's the main reason why I love playing intensely as myself. When the connection is between two people being themselves, it is, to my mind at any rate, more fulfilling than role play, though that is fulfilling in a different way. I was chatting to Abel a couple days after we had played the table scene. I was to curious as to whether he had been playing that scene as any sort of character. I knew that I had been me, but I didn't know if the same applied to him. His response was, and apologies if I'm misquoting slightly. “No, it was me abusing you.” Of course to anyone outside our world that statement would be terribly worrying, but of course he was “abusing” me in a way I wanted, and with my consent, and for me, that was a delicious response. Allowing myself to let go with that handful of people and experience that level of intensity, and of submissiveness, is one of the best things about This Thing We Do.