Dear Reader/Random Passer-by/Russian Spy *
Many apologies that this blog/totally truthful account of life/secret private diary has not been updated recently.
This is because I have been busy watching the world cup/fraternising with the enemy/being spanked repeatedly/overdosing on chocolate.
In the event that you care that this blog/account/diary has not been updated recently, please rest assured that it will be updated as soon as I have pruned the roses/oiled my canes/rescued a stray sheep/investigated a secret spy ring/stalked George Clooney. Unless of course, I get bored/a cold/whisked off to sunnier climes/arrested.
We thank you for your continued loyalty/monetary donations/silence.
The Writer.
* Please delete as appropriate.
19 hours ago
Posts
8 comments:
Loves it
I want a full refund, or else payment in kind!
;-)
Lol! I wouldn't mind if you kept writing blog posts like these. Even though Rebecca now put Paris Hilton in my head, which isn't what I want to have on my brain when I'm supposed to go to bed. ;-)
OMG, you've learned CorporateSpeak! Love the parody thereof!
I'm most concerned for the stray sheep, what will happen if you get a cold before rescuing it?
Talking of that beautiful Russian female spy that was caught. I would do a James Bond solution. Take her over my knee, pull up her dress, take down her panties, and give that tender bare bottom of hers, a good painfull spanking. Then send her back to 'Russia with Love'.
No, comrade: you forgot the secret code. It's supposed to be, "I have been busy watching George Clooney spank a sheep. And you?"
Do you take bribes?
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