Friday, 11 September 2009


My fantasies have always very much been of good girls who make silly mistakes and get their just desserts. They are fundamentally well behaved, and have maybe only been dealt with, by an authority figure, once or twice. These girls of my fantasies, stories and role plays are mortified by having let themselves down, and often find some sort of catharsis or forgiveness in punishment. Basically, they reflect various facets of me. I am, in most parts of my life, the good girl. If you've been reading this blog for any length of time and haven't picked up on this, then you're just not paying enough attention ;-) This is why the stories of people like Abel and Haron spoke so deeply to me when I first found them five or so years ago. The ones I discovered were often around that very theme – the good girl, justly punished.
Nowadays I find my self wanting to write about and play darker things. I haven't yet done so, but pieces of scenes flit through my head: unjust punishments, where girls are punished for things they *haven't* done, begging for mercy to those who are immune to such pleas. Bad girls who deserve all they have coming to them, in school, or prison, or the workhouse, who are not at all repentant for their crimes. Girls who push the limits to see where it will take them, who aren't afraid of the consequences.
These will be more difficult scenes for me to play or write, as the psychology is so removed from my own somewhat obsessive need to be the good girl, that it's something I'd have a hard time relating too. That's probably one of the things that makes it all the more fascinating for me though: that leap into the darker facets of character and motivation. How would a girl who didn't care react to being punished? Would she just brazen it out? Would it take longer for her to crack? Would she be less likely to give someone the “pleasure of seeing her contrition? I don't know, but I might let my mind wander and find out. (Except maybe not in work time. Maybe.)


Indy said...

"Girls who push the limits to see where it will take them, who aren't afraid of the consequences."

Ah, that's my favorite fantasy, perhaps because even though I was a bit of a rebel at heart, I was afraid of the consequences. That was probably for the best, really, but I soooo wanted to be braver!

Graham said...

Ooh, awesome topic, and something I've actually been wanting to ask people about - that is, when role-playing, do you like to choose characters/scenes you can relate to, or is it more fun to step into a totally new persona?

In reality, I'm also more of a "good girl" type, but the kind that would never show contrition during punishment... either because I wouldn't consider myself deserving, or I wouldn't respect the use of brute force : )

Fortunately, role play is not about reality! But I'm still figuring out what sort of characters I'd like to explore. It'll be interesting to see where these darker fantasies take you!

Caroline Grey said...

I found my arc beginning in a bit of a dark place: a very, very ,miserably bad girl deserved everything coming to her. This proved to be difficult and ugly and un-fun in pracice, so I moved immediately to goofy brat girl who tumbles into spankings, which was great fun. The more realistic good girl who makes mistakes and goofs up and is appropriately punished for them has actually been a new experience for me. All the rest, (and the ones you mentioned are so evocative and archetypal for me!) well, it comes a little at the time. One thing I've had to remind myself from time to time is to take a while to explore these places in my head before I rush to take them into actual scenes. Just as you said...let your mind wander through them.

Abel1234 said...

Interesting to compare this to the evolution of my own interests... from, as you say, 'good girl gone bad'... to a fair amount these days of 'bad but deserving girl'. To get to 'undeserving but punished anyway'... mmm, you have my mind racing in all sorts of naughty directions!

Ernest said...

"How would a girl who didn't care react to being punished? Would she just brazen it out? Would it take longer for her to crack? Would she be less likely to give someone the “pleasure of seeing her contrition?"

This is a very exciting thought. All of this scene is about letting us be temporarily the people we never were but would have liked to be - the ruthless top, the defiant sub. When I am in sub mode it is important that the punishment should have no permanent effects - and how better show this than by being someone who doesn't care and does indeed 'come back for more' - again and again!

Happy blogging!


Pandora Blake said...

Oooh, lots of tasty archetypes here :)

Like a lot of people, my first fantasies were "innocent victim" ones. I was a Victorian orphan, unfair beleagured, a waif and stray, who did her very best but whom the world was cruel to anyway. *handstapleforehead*

Then as a teenager I got into really edgy, gritty non-consent victim fantasies, being kidnapped, raped, abused. These days it's the full range - I still like being the hardworking innocent subject to unfair treatment, but tough girls, freedom fighters, women kicking out or fighting back. And, recently, consensual characters, gameplayers, people who know what they want and go out and get it.

Hapless victims is still the stock favourite, though. And I've never really got much out of scenarios where I'm bratty or irresponsible. I guess I take myself too seriously ;)