I went to my spa the other day, and had a lovely time, apart from one little incident. I was saddened to see a young woman (very early twenties) with what pretty much anyone would consider to be a "nice" body. Slimmish, though not skinny (not that there's anything wrong with skinny), nice chest, nice bum, wearing shorts over her bikini. She was obviously not comfortable enough in her own skin to just wear bikini bottoms in that environment. And I really did think that was sad. What sort of society do we live in where young women, even those who by any "accepted" standard would be considered very attractive, are too insecure to "expose" their body in what is actually a surprisingly forgiving environment, with all shapes and sizes on display?
Well, I know the answer: a society that strives for perfection in everything to do with looks, for women, and increasingly for men. If you read too many papers and watch too much television, or rather pay too much attention to what they say, you will spend your life striving for a body ideal that is suitable for only a very few people.
Of course, I have no right to criticise. I have my own share of body issues, and to be frank, they are justified, as I'm fat, and need to be less fat. On the other hand, I long ago learnt not to aspire to "conventional" standards of beauty, as I'm never going to be slender - it's just not in my genes. Coming from hearty country stock I would always be a "big" girl even if I was not overweight.
Let's move on though, as this is not supposed to be my issues, but about the confidence I've gained over the past couple of years. The spanking scene, on the whole, seems fairly open and accepting of all sorts of body shapes. Or possibly I've just been very lucky with the group of people I've met. What their acceptance has given me is the ability to become more at ease with my unclothed, or partly clothed body.
When I started this, even baring my bum was a little traumatic. In front of one person. Then I started going to events like Lowewood where we all got undressed together, something which I'd only really done under a towel in other communal changing situations before. Also, I was being spanked in front of other people, having my knickers pulled down. And so it grew, via parties where I danced around in my underwear, to the extent that a couple of weeks ago I not only *totally* undressed in front of two tops, but then ran through the house completely naked to show the remaining girls the stripes on my bum and thighs. Of course, one of the reasons for that complete lack of inhibition was because I was on a high, but even so, that was a big first.
So yes, like most women, (and probably a lot of men) I have body issues. But, through the generally non-judgemental nature of our community, I have gained a huge amount of confidence over the past few months, and even learnt, that, god forbid, some people actually *like* bigger girls. Here's to many more years to come of running around naked!
1 day ago