I want to take my canes somewhere, and I don't have a bag big enough to fit them in. I am also not about to just parade out to my car with a couple of canes and a crop in my hand. So what's a girl to do in this situation? Well, in the grand old tradition of Blue Peter and Why Don't You (for my non-UK readers, these are children's TV programmes which encouraged children to make things), I decided to make a cane carrier.
Here are the instructions for anyone who would like to make their own cane carrier:
1) Remove cardboard tube from centre of wrapping paper.
2) Re-roll wrapping paper after it unravels all over the floor due to cardboard tube removal.
3) Put canes in cardboard tube.
4) Smile at job well done.
5) Look again and realise canes stick out the end by a good three inches or so.
7) Go to bathroom.
8) Detach remaining toilet roll from cardboard tube. Henceforth this shall be tube b, and the wrapping paper one will be tube a.
9) Dump unravelled loo roll over the towel rail.
10) Put tube b over tube b.
11) Sellotape tube a and tube b together.
13) Re-sellotape tube a and tube b together after they come apart.
14) Put canes in the new, super dooper (S-D) tube.
15) Consider fashioning fancy ends for S-D tube.
16) Decide that's really far too much like hard work.
17) Shove a bunch of sellotape over the bottom end of the tube.
18) Realise that longest cane still sticks out the top by a cm or so.
19) Think about rectifying this problem.
20) Decide it's not worth the effort.
21) Shove a load of sellotape over the top end of S-D tube.
22) Realise that sellotape won't re-stick once it comes off.
23) Decide that resealing S-D tube is a problem for another day.
24) Beam in pride at handy work, declare the job finished and rename S-D tube to "Cane Carrier Deluxe".
I was going to take a photo to show you, but I also decided that that was too much effort. You may be spotting a theme here...
5 hours ago