Answers 2

The follow on from Answers 1.
EmmaJane asked: "Ok, here's one, what are your thoughts on bondage play and being restrained?"
Gah, I'm having to think about my answers again, not fair! OK, bondage for the sake of bondage does very little for me. Just being tied up "for no reason" leaves me pretty much cold. However, I do like the thought of being restrained during spanking, and have been restrained before now, though generally for erotic spankings rather than in a role play. I would be more wary about being restrained during a role play, even though I find the idea very hot. Erotic spanking by its very nature tends to be less severe. A punishment in a role play would probably be harder, and I worry about being tied up, and less, well, in control... (I'm still working on that giving up control thing). Don't get me wrong, I have all sorts of fantasies that involve being restrained, tied down to whipping benches or tables, birched or caned or strapped, but whether I would be able to act out the "restrained" piece of these fantasies in real life is debatable. Also, my wrist phobia means that anything round my wrists has to be tied fairly loose (i.e. loose enough to come off, and in fact be more symbolic than actual restraint.) Yes, I have a wrist phobia. Yes, I know it's weird. Yes, if you know someone in real life with a wrist phobia who is female and mid thirties it's probably me. So come and tell me you read my blog, OK?
Alyx asked: "Do you think you've "evolved" to darker themes when playing because you've been doing it for awhile now and have explored the lighter themes enough? Do you think it has anything to do with your personality at all, or is it totally unrelated? Or is it maybe just what happens as people start to want to play "harder"?
Alyx, yes I think you're right that I've "evolved" to darker themes because I've been doing this for a while, but not because I've explored lighter themes enough. I still love playing lighter themes - at the end of the day I'm a wimp! I think darker themes have always been there, but time has allowed me to accept that it's actually OK to have darker fantasies as well as lighter ones. I also think that it is more natural, as you become more experienced and do want to play a bit harder sometimes, that the level of play you want lends itself more to some scenarios than others. Hard play does not always sit well in a light hearted fantasy or role play.
Lastly, is it to do with my personality? I think probably not. I don't have a huge amount of darkness in me, really. I'm quite a sunshiny person. I don't like books or movies which scare me, I prefer summer to winter. The depths and darkness of my soul are really not that deep or dark (shallow as a puddle, me). Which is somewhat of a contradiction, I realise, to what I just said about having darker fantasies. I suppose these darker fantasies are at the extreme limit of my personality. And they are a lot less extreme than for a lot of people. (The wimp thing again!)

Abel asked: You've written recently about wanting less, or less severe spankings. Do you think this is a phase, or where you've ultimately got to having explored various styles of scene?
It had *better* be a phase, is all I can say. At the end of the day, I love having marks, I love having that soreness, and you can only get that from playing fairly hard. And I enjoy playing hard (for me, not in comparison to some!), I don't want to be a wimp. I also love playing lots, and if I lived in perfect world, I would be spanked every day. So yes, it had BETTER be a phase!
Obviously, since the "Questions" post, my desire for all things spanking has started to return, and thank goodness for that. Because I would have been suing, you know. I'm not sure who, but I would be.